Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Saying Goodbye to the 'Dubs

I will miss the big W, the 'dubs, the initial that defines my last name.  I plan on taking Mike's last name when I get married and I will dearly miss my unique, yet long and frequently misspelled, last name.

Hyphenation is not an option, as my maiden-name is ten letters long.  Combining the two surnames would result in eighteen letters.  I do not wish that on any of my hypothetical children.
I will instead move thy dear ol' W to my middle name...which will make my already long name even longer, but I don't care. I need the W.

My last name was good to me for so many years (28 and counting).  Sure, it lead to a little bit of teasing, but mostly conversation starters, as in "How the heck do you say that?" and "Where's that from?"
What's more, sporting the initials VW lead to "borrowing" VW hubcaps, receiving them as gifts, wearing VW memorabilia, and secretly coveting a VW bus for so, so  long.  I want a DC United soccer jersey not because we live in DC, but because of the VW logo.  I love representing myself with the letters V and W. 

I need a way to keep this VW alive, and perhaps permanently ingrained in me.
I'm thinking of another tatoo, here.
The risk excites me!
(but I'll probably chicken out.  Mom, you can breathe a sigh of relief now!)



 {source}

58 comments:

  1. I added my last name to my name as well, so now I have four names. I just loved both my middle and last name too much to get rid of either.

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  2. As another Polish girl who has a freaking LONG name, I totally get this entire post.

    I have seriously grown into my last name. Granted, there was a time when I hated it (pretty much all of middle school, some of high school), but by the time I was out of college I was wearing my ridiculously long, impossible to pronounce correctly, mouthful of a last name with pride.

    I've briefly thought what I would do if Vince and I took the plunge,... I still don't know. I had not considered the middle name option. (But I have considered not taking his name altogether,... mwahaha).

    (I also support a new tattoo... >:)

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  3. @Em: Yup, I'm not discarding anything here!

    @Lucky: Girl, you TOTALLY get it (and me!)

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  4. I've always wanted a VW bus too!!

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  5. I hope you never steal the hubcaps off of my VW! Hehe :) Those are awesome initials, though; I can see why you'd mourn the loss!

    My husband and I both had last names that started with "Gr", so when we got married, my initials stayed the same. I had the HARDEST time adjusting to writing my married name because of how similiar they were. I started with "Gr..." and, by habit, I'd continued spelling out my maiden name!

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  6. I had a hard time giving up my last maiden name too! It was long and hard to spell (Dutch) and now it is Knapp. But people still spell that wrong. *sigh*

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  7. Congrats on the pending nuptuals. In some ways I am looking forward to changing my last name. We have been together for almost 10 years. I think its time. The only drawback, once we do get married, his mother and I will have the same name. How weird will that be?!

    Celebrate Life and Capture It!
    Patty

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  8. I love my last name too. For the longest time I hated it, but I appreciated it when I went to college-- there's only one person in the entire campus that has my last name, and that's me! I plan to keep it even after I've gotten married. :) Stopping by from SITS!

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  9. I didn't give mine up. I hyphenated and now have a hyphenated fifteen letter long Hungarian-Japanese last name. It's horrific and I love it! My husband and kids are not hyphenated. Happy SITS Friday potluck!

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  10. OVer from SITS

    I didn't change my last name when I got married. I don't really like my last name, but it's mine, it's who I am, so it's stayed. My husband likes to tell people I'm the nanny - especially because all three of my kids look exactly like HIM!

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  11. I totally get where you are coming from on this one - I intentionally kept my ex's name when we divorced because I really love seeing the look on peoples faces when the ask my name... and I can say "Elizabeth Taylor". I get great comments, usually a "I bet you love that"... I laugh and tell them I married the man not the money, got rid of the man, and never saw a dime.
    Happy SITS Friday!

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  12. I left a post earlier, but I guess it didn't stick! Anyway, Happy SITS Potluck Friday! Congrats on your upcoming wedding!

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  13. My maiden name was only 3 letters long and everyone spelled and pronounced it wrong! I thought I'd be happy to change it, but I miss it so much. At least it was unique!
    Happy SITS Potluck Day and Congrats on your wedding!

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  14. Happy SITS Friday. It was a tough decision to give up my last name when I got married, but I did it. Apart from the sentimental stuff, it also gets tough to establish your identity with old official documents.
    Congrats on your upcoming wedding.

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  15. I was thrilled to get to keep my maiden name when I married my Italian husband over here in Italy. All women automatically keep their names so I didn't even have to decide if I wanted to or not!

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  16. I went from one kind of ordinary surname to another, so not a big deal. BUT I so understand! I took a different surname (that of my guardians) during high school because I thought it would let me avoid having to explain a difficult family situation. It gave me the initials ET, and I hated it but did it anyway. Was so glad to get my real name back after high school :)

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  17. I would do the same, my name is quite long too (9 letters) and is almost always spelt incorrectly. I like it though - it's MY name. When I get married I'll be relegating it to a middle name - there's no way I'm losing it entirely!
    Jade

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  18. Yeah, but you prolly won't want to wear any VW logo when you get pregnant. I wouldn't have, seeing as how I was bigger than a VW about 13 weeks into each pregnancy.

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  19. I kept my own name...Easy and short! :)
    Happy SITS Friday from Casablanca, Morocco!

    BLOGitse

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  20. Happy SITS Friday Potluck!

    When I got married, I asked my ex to take my last name...he wasn't on board. Hyphenation wasn't an option for me either, so I made it my middle name. It's also The Girl Child's middle name. When I got divorced, (not that you are going there:)) I took it back faster than you can say Boo! and I'm NOT giving it up ever again, even if I remarry! ;)

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  21. I hear ya on the attachment to your name. I had the opposite problem where my new last name is the one that's hard to spell, the old one was easy! Good for you on keeping it in the middle and congrats on your upcoming nuptials! Have a great SITs day!

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  22. As a travel agent, I thank you for not hyphenating your last name. It wouldn't even fit on a ticket and you can't add the dash. :-) LOL.

    I'm getting married in October, but I plan on keeping my maiden name. Some days I have pangs over not taking the new last name, but my dad died last December and I thought I could honor his memory by keeping it.

    VW are very cool initials!!

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  23. One of my biggest regrets is that I dropped my maiden name when I got married. My maiden name was part of my identity, it's who I was a good chunk of my life and I wish I'd thought to move it to my middle name. Congrats on your upcoming wedding- June is a fabulous month to get married!

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  24. Stopping by from SITS. My maiden name is a lot like yours - hard to spell, and always mispronounced. When I got married, I was sad to see it go but also happy that I got a new last name that was super-easy to say and spell. Some people actually look at me all cock-eyed when I tell them by (real) name now, like I'm lying or something. Or maybe it's just bc they're jealous that they don't have a name as easy as mine. Lol!

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  25. Happy SITS potluck to you.

    Ha! I hyphenated my last name. It's 16 characters long. The font on my driver's license is teeny tiny to have my entire name fit on one line. Hilarious.

    I have no difficulty flying with my name. It's a non-issue. The airlines just drop the hyphen.

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  26. When I married my initials became LSD.

    Happy SITS Day!

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  27. Just stopping by from SITS. Congrats are being featured!! I too am a newlywed and previously had a crazy last name that no one could spell or pronouce and the first letter was silent so whenever I checked in at sign in table I would have to tell people to look in the E's and not I's. Now I have a short last name "Ott" and surprisingly people try to pronounce it Out. It took me awhile to get used to the new last name too, people would ask me "what are the Ott's doing this weekend?" And I would be like how should I know... oh wait that's me...
    Anyway, enough babbling have a great weekend!!!

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  28. Hello fellow W! I love my W too, and I'm trying to figure out ways to keep it in my life (hypothetically, since I'm not engaged... yet?). I thought it would be a lovely idea if my boy took my W and I took his M and together we hyphenated W-M legally... but for all practical purposes went by M. I think it's a lovely gesture of both taking on each other and our families - he thinks its too complicated. So I will probably lose my W too, and I will go from being MW to MM. I like the idea of keeping it as an initial though - I'll have to think that one over.

    Happy SITS Friday! Oh! I'm 28 too and I'll definitely be back!

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  29. Ugh, I hated that! Although my maiden name gave me a lot of annoyance (it was French and no one could ever pronounce it) when it came to changing to my married name I found myself feeling a little sad. And with my maiden name being 9 letters and my married being 11 there was no way I could put them together.

    It's a sad choice, for sure.

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  30. I have to laugh! I went from "Baker" as a maiden nam to a 10 letter Lithuanian name--took me some getting use to, but now, after 20 years, people remember me better becuase of the hard last name!!

    anne
    www.anniebakes.net

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  31. Happy SITS Friday Potluck! I have a horrible Polish last name that no one can pronounce and married a guy with a horrible Polish last name that no one can pronounce. I kept my maiden name after much deliberation.

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  32. Victoria, I understand your feelings but trust me, you made a WISE decision. I did not do it. I kept my inpossible to pronouce last name and added my husbands to it. Plus I have two middle names. It is a disaster! Happy Friday!

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  33. It was a really difficult decision for me to change my last name to my married name. I also contemplated different options and ended up using my maiden name as my new middle name. It took me almost a year to get used to my new name and get over the "loss" of my maiden name. Five years later, I'm glad I made the choice to change my name. We now have a child together and I love sharing the same last name as him. It certainly makes things easier, too!

    Congrats on your marriage...and your potluck SITS Day!

    -Aimee

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  34. My fiance is taking my last name and I couldn't be more excited. His last name has been a running joke in our house because it's a type of meat. Mine is much better. Congrats on your upcoming wedding and Happy Sits day!

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  35. Visiting from SITS!

    Congrats on your upcoming nuptials :) I say keep the nick name AND take his name. Just no hyphens...your right on that one!

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  36. Happy SITS day!

    And I hyphenated. My last name is now 13 letters long. My first name is 9 letters. My signature never fits on any lines, but whatever...

    We did not hyphenate the kids' names -- they just have two middle names: first name - middle name - my maiden name - hubby's surname. Works for us!

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  37. Love those initials :) So cool!!!! My maiden name never really meant much to me because my dad was adopted, so I was happy to let it go and take on my husbands last name :)
    Happy SITS day! I'm following you now!

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  38. I like my husband's last name. It was still weird though to make the change! Congrats on your SITS feature!

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  39. when i finished up my PHD i wanted to put my maiden name on my diploma as my middle name. the university insisted i hadn't registered with that as my middle name and refused to award it that way. they told me i had to provide documentation that was my name at the time. it was but it had just gotten "misplaced"...as far as i was concerned. i learned to get it back on official records i'd have to get a judge (who didn't know me from eve) to reissue it. Yeah? amazing isn't it? anyway, i told them if i couldn't get it with the name i wanted on it (given they had my undergraduate records which clearly showed that WAS my maiden name i didn't see the issue) i didn't want the damn thing...they could keep it. they awarded the diploma with my maiden name. my point? once you legally give that name up it ain't so easy to get it back.

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  40. Happy SITS Potluck!
    Seems like we all have the last name issue. I went from 7 letter H: "Hhhhhhhhhhhhhhow do you say your last name?" to 9 letter S: dudes, there's no L, no M, no K, and you might want to put the H back. I couldn't give up my maiden name - my maternal grandpa fought too much for me to have it to give it up - so I hyphenated my middle name. Only have to use it on legal documents; and if I use my middle initials, it's R-H.

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  41. That was very cute! :)

    Popping in from SITS! And I'm with mom .... no tattoos! :)

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  42. You are loosing a unique last name, but gaining a great husband... pretty good trade! I decided to keep my last name when I married so I didn't get to say good bye to it. Now that I have children, however, I'm the only one with a different last name in the family!
    Congrats on your SITS day!

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  43. Congratulations on your upcoming marriage. I have a few friends who are authors who have kept their maiden names only for their book titles, and in all other areas of life have taken their husband's last name. Perhaps your "VW" could continue to be your nom de plume for your blog? I'm so curious what the "W" stands for. Looked on your "About" page, but alas... Beautiful looking blog, BTW, and wonderful writing style.

    Stopping by from SITS.
    Have a great weekend!

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  44. Stopping by from SITS. My problem when I get married will be giving up my easy to spell and pronounce last name. Maybe my hypothetical husband will have the last name Smith or Jones.

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  45. Hi! Visiting from SITS and "stealing" your button! Congrats on your wedding. I changed my name like a flash going from an A name to a K name. My kids thank me every time they don't have to go first for an oral report LOL!

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  46. Congrats on your upcoming wedding! I took my hubby's last name when I got married by gave my first child my maiden name as a middle name.

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  47. I recently had to change my last name to my husbands as well. I'm not into the whole hyphenated thing and I'm not feminist enough to keep my own name, but it is annoying to go from a more refined sounding last name to a complete tongue twister. I didn't change it legally yet, because it's a whole process and I was still in school when I got married, which makes the whole thing more complicated, but I still go by his name and it definitely takes getting used to!
    Happy Potluck Friday and have a great weekend!

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  48. Stopping by from SITS. Have a great day!

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  49. Happy SITS Potluck Friday! Congrats on your upcoming marriage!

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  50. Happy SITS Potluck Friday, you'll get used to the new name. I promise :).

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  51. Happy SITS Potluck Friday... going from hard to easy is alot better than easy to hard but you're still giving up your whole being, if you don't keep the name somewhere... we did that back when I married and it was almost immediate isolation once my husband started traveling... folks can't find you etc... I like the way you younger people do it, so that you don't lose your identity by marrying... maintain... and come visit when you can...

    Twitter: SolarChief

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  52. Happy SITS Potluck day! I dropped my maiden name when I got married. I waited a long time to do that! Hehe. I had W too, but I hated being at the end of the alphabet. Now I have G. I love my new name!

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  53. Happy SITS Potluck Day. I am trying to convince my fiance to take my last name instead of me taking his. So far I am not winning.

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  54. I chose to take my husband's last name also. I didn't like my maiden name so I was very happy to do so!:) Stopping by from SITS!

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  55. I had a horrible last name and I was more then ready to get rid of it and take my husbands name when I got married. However, my initials stayed the same, so that saved me a lot of heartache. =)

    Happy SITS potluck day!

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  56. Popping over from SITS! I mourned my last name too when I got married almost six years ago! Its hard, but now, I can't imagine my name as any other than my married name. Its worth it in the end, I promise! Marriage is a great ride!

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  57. I'm a W, too. CW...so not as much fun as the VW, though.
    Congrats on your feature!

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  58. I kept my maiden name as my middle name. I'll always be a part of my family, so I didn't want to lose the name. Then as an anniversary gift this year, my hubby told me that he's planning on changing his middle name to my maiden name as well. So we will match. :)

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